'It is quite relentless': The mental toll on male carers

When his mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease in June 2022, Nick left his job in Brisbane and moved 1,120 kilometres back to the Shoalhaven in NSW.

"I really took on the primary carer role and now I live at home and have been supporting my mum," the 31-year-old said.

"I feel like it is quite relentless, in just keeping on top of everything."

Nick is among almost three million Australians who are informal carers of loved ones. Men make up about one third.

A new study by Australian researchers has focused on male caregivers and found evidence that men who become carers have a greater risk of reporting depressive symptoms a few years later.

"Unpaid care has traditionally been carried out by women and as we advance in terms of gender equality, we are rightly seeing a redistribution of care, with more men carrying out this care," Associate Professor Tania King said.

"We know that among women, unpaid care can impact on mental health, but there had been little research among men.

"What this research fundamentally shows is the need to recognise and support unpaid caregivers, both male and female."

For Nick, caring for his mother full time is a job he does willingly, yet he has noticed its impacts on his mental health and social life.

"Your friendships suffer, your support networks, all those elements of your life that maybe played a big part previously, all that falls away," he said.

"In the background I'm always thinking about, do I need to do more shopping, do I have everything."

The turning point was when he began to identify as a carer.

"When I actually took on the actual identity of being a carer, that was when I started looking out more for myself than just the person receiving care," he said.

Nick was then prompted by a friend who told him "it can't hurt" to attend support groups for male carers through the government service Carer Gateway.

"Even hearing from other carers about what they're going through, everyone just gets it ... you can't do it alone," he said.

"If I'm doing well, then I can support my mum longer ... I can keep my mum at home for as long as possible which is the overarching goal."

Daryn Steer also knows the challenges male carers face when it comes to dealing with their own mental health.

He facilitates online male carer support groups in the Newcastle and Hunter region, and works as a carer advocate for One Door Mental Health.

Like Nick, Mr Steer believes men in caregiving roles must first recognise that they are carers in order to get on top of their own mental health.

"It's them realising they need help which is probably the biggest issue," Mr Steer said.

"Once they receive help, you get to see the positive impacts."

Mr Steer doesn't believe there are major differences between male and female carers, but said that women are more likely to access help than men.

The 2022 National Carer Survey asked 1,144 male carers across Australia about their experiences.

The average Personal Wellbeing Index score among male respondents was 62.1 per cent, significantly lower than the national average of 75 per cent.

Almost half (48.8 per cent) of the male respondents reported being socially isolated or highly socially isolated and 34.8 per cent reported high or very high psychological distress.

"The social isolation, stigma and demands of caring can take their toll on a person's mental health," Carers NSW CEO Elena Katrakis said.

"We see that in the increasing research highlighting the high rates of psychological distress among male carers."

Free support services for carers is available through Carer Gateway by calling 1800 422 737.

Carers can also access information support from the carer organisation in their state or territory.

Nick's surname has been withheld for anonymity.

Support is available for those who may be distressed. Phone Lifeline 13 11 14 or Men's Referral Service 1300 776 491.